Call me the Escape Artist

Conflicts are all around us.  They are everywhere that people are.  Knowing how to productively manage them can be the difference between a positive outcome or a negative one. 

Recently there was a situation at work where a parent was very upset because we had found a tick on her one year old son. She said she doesn’t want her child outside anymore! I asked her if she had a dog at home. She was very offended and said where she comes from they don’t have ticks!  She said her son HAD to have got the tick while in our care.  I tried to reassure her that ticks were common in Pennsylvania and that just because a tick was found on her son, that doesn’t mean he will get Lyme disease.  She said she called the pediatrician and they didn’t seem too concerned about it.  Again, I told her that it was very common and only about 20% of tick causes result in Lyme disease.  I also told her that the tick needed to be on the skin for 24 – 48 hours before it could cause Lyme disease which, by the way, is treated with antibiotics. She seemed satisfied and I thought that the matter was resolved.  A few weeks later, our Board of Directors received a letter from her saying that she believes we have an infestation of ticks and we are doing nothing about it. She contacted the Health Department to complain because she would feel really bad if children got Lyme disease because of our carelessness. Our Board, like myself, felt as though she were overreacting. I decided to contact the Health Department myself and see what advice they could offer. I told them we have 80 children and that only one child had a tick;  however, the parent was very upset.  He laughed and said he talked to that parent the day before!  He told me I could treat the area with pesticides.  I responded by saying that in doing that, I may have many unhappy parents.  I was told that everything has pesticides in it - - children’s vaccines, our clothing, our food…everything!  He proceeded to tell me that once the pesticide was applied and dried, it was no longer harmful.  My boss and I decided we would go ahead and treat the play area this weekend.  I put out an email to families that although there have been no further incidents of ticks, we decided to be proactive and spray our play area.  Hopefully this will satisfy the parent; however, it may be too early to tell.  I did hear a parent asking a teacher what all the fuss was about.  He said his boys play in the woods all the time and when they find a tick, they just take it off with tweezers. 

I believe I used the 3 R’s as I was respectful, responsive and reciprocal.  I also used NVC.  I would say I tried the “escapist strategy” because of the nature of this conflict. I just wanted to make this parent happy.  There was no compromise, as I just did everything as if there were a true “infestation” as she claimed.  Customer satisfaction is what is important and we did all we could to appease this parent.  This same parent caused a similar conflict when her child was in the infant room.  He had the little bumps on his cheeks as many babies get.  She insisted it was caused by perfumes that our staff was wearing.  Needless to say, the infant room staff had to quit wearing perfume until her child was out of their room!