Practicing Awareness of Microaggressions

     After learning about microaggressions this week, I have been listening to see if I could hear any examples in my day-to-day life.  Here is what I heard:

     In a 4 year old preschool class, the children were running on the playground playing soccer.  A boy said to a girl, "It's OK that you can't run as fast as me.  Boys are supposed to run faster."

    Also with the 4 year old group, the children were standing in line to wash their hands.  One girl said she was going to marry another girl.  A boy piped in and said, "Girls don't marry girls"  The girl responded with, "In some states they do.  My dad told me." 

    Watching "The Big Bang Theory" the other night, Penny asked Sheldon to teach her some physics so she could talk to Leonard about his job.  Sheldon replied, "Well I suppose if someone could teach sign language to Cocoa the Gorilla, I could teach you some rudimentary physics."

     Also on "The Big Bang Theory", Sheldon handed Penny a notebook and said, "Here.  It's college ruled.  I  hope it's not too intimidating."

    I think that the examples with the children show that children are curious about their roles and they like to know exactly what boys do and what girls do.  They are understanding that boys and girls are different.  The gender micro invalidations made by the boys are giving the message that the girls reality is not valid.  I do not think the boys intended to be harmful in any way.  In fact, I feel that they were voicing what their reality was and this is how they have always know life to be.

    In the sitcom, Sheldon was using microassaults because he was intentionally hurtful to Penny.  I was not offended by this; however, because I know it was meant to be funny.  For those of you who watch the show, you know that Penny can stand her ground.  In a previous episode, she told Sheldon "could you stop acting like yourself for a while and comfort me." 

     These observations make me feel that microaggressions begin early in life based on what we believe is true and correct.  We also see them in our entertainment which some people may take as justification for using them.  I feel that both can be learning experiences.  When we correct our children by saying things like, "girls can run fast too" or "what he said on TV was really kinda mean.  We wouldn't want to say that to our friends" then we are teaching our children.   With guidance, children will learn right from wrong, good from bad, etc.  It is up to the adults to ensure that the learning opportunities are used wisely.